[benellis58]

OMAR's second hand today. Here the GIBBO robots are at their "peak" (ha, ha). OMAR writes "The West robot gave me a fine score by basically dropping 12 tricks straight into my lap in my contract of 3NT, thanks to typical GIBBO plays like the lead and shift".

My comments:

On this auction, I would not want to be on lead against 3NT with West's hand, as "anything" could turn out "right" or "wrong" depending on what the random layout turned out to be. West is fairly confident that East is bankrupt. He opted for the lead of the stiff spade jack, which, as it turns out, cost nothing...whether or not it was a good choice in theory. He fell back on his GIB "training" (ha, ha) and led one of his two singletons.

Where he REALLY blew it was with his INSANE shift to the heart king after winning his diamond king. Having already seen the dummy, he now KNOWS for SURE that his partner East does not have even a SINGLE high card point. Thus he KNOWS that he is GUARANTEEING that dummy's queen will be a winner WITHOUT declarer having to first lose a trick to his king. Since West has no black cards remaining, and since any other heart would allow declarer to call for dummy's queen (which would ALSO result in 12 tricks for NS), West might as well shrug his shoulders and cash his ace of diamonds at trick four, since at this point declarer can't be prevented from taking ELEVEN tricks anyway, and cashing the second diamond will at least prevent GIFTING declarer with TWELVE tricks. Furthermore, EVEN if West instead STUPIDLY plays a heart, he should at LEAST lead the JACK, not the KING! On the lead of the jack, declarer should certainly not go wrong, but at least there is a (tiny) chance that he might, but on the lead of the king, it's IMPOSSIBLE for ANY declarer to go wrong. (Well, okay: Maybe a GIBBO "declarer" might go wrong EVEN there!).

https://www.bridgeba...HA%7Cmc%7C12%7C

[benellis58]

West's 2S overcall of South's 1NT opener shows spades and a minor.

North's takeout double (of...SPADES!) shows, as per the GIB definition (which, amazingly, is actually CORRECT here!): 8-9 HCP, exactly four hearts, and 3-5 cards in each minor.

East has 976, 853, KJ82, J105. His obvious call, his only possible call is "PASS"! He has a mere 5 HCP. He has a pancake flat 3-3-4-3 hand. He has THREE spades, which is certainly adequate (whether or not EW can make anything), and he has ONLY three clubs and ONLY four diamonds. EITHER minor would be played a level higher, and he doesn't even yet know WHICH minor West has. Looking only at his own East hand, there is NO EARTHLY REASON for East to think that three of EITHER minor will play better than 2S, and there is also NO EARTHLY REASON for East to bid. And yet...GIBBO ROBOT (!!!) that he is, he makes the ridiculous bid of 2NT, asking his "partner" West to state which minor he has.

If this insane action was committed by ANYONE or ANYTHING other than a GIBBO robot, it would be headline news...but for a GIBBO robot, it's..."Ho hum. What else is new?

https://www.bridgeba...D6%7Cmc%7C10%7C

[benellis58]

The result was fine, but North's bidding was not. He overbid with 3NT when he should merely have invited with 2NT.

"Oh yeah?" the GIBBO fan club members will say in unison (assuming that there is more than ONE member left who actually STILL defends the robots),"But you made eleven tricks, so you're all wet, Bennyboy, and his bid was brilliant."

WRONGOLA, o faithful LONE Ranger of the GIBBO Wild West. If he had (correctly) invited, I would, with my GOOD hand, have accepted. We would have reached 3NT anyway, so his silly, UNILATERAL overbid gained us NOTHING, but if he had not been LUCKY enough to find me with a GOOD hand, if I had happened to have a weaker hand that would have REFUSED the INVITATION (that he SHOULD have made instead of his unilateral overbid), he would NOT have made his contract, and it would have been entirely his fault. So, as is so often the case, he gained NOTHING and was LUCKY that his BAD bad bid did not cost.

https://www.bridgeba...HJ%7Cpc%7CC8%7C

[benellis58]

North's 3H: TYPICALLY stupid, TYPICALLY annoying, TYPICALLY ridiculous CUE BID (!) at a HIGH (three) level by a TYPICALLY hopeless GIBBO robot.

As you would expect, the GIB definition of 3H is also typically pathetic, and as a bonus, it shows yet AGAIN that GIB has absolutely no understanding whatsoever of "total" points.

But horrendous as the GIB definition is, North cannot even match THAT! The definition states that his call shows "4+ clubs". He has three: the 1086. The definition states that he has "5+ HCP". He has four...all in quacks.

It would be unfair for us to expect PERFECTION from GIB/GIBBO, but surely we should not CONSTANTLY be subjected to the POLAR OPPOSITE of perfection!

https://www.bridgeba...S8%7Cmc%7C10%7C

[benellis58]

Where the Hell is West's 4S bid coming from? He already showed his values with his earlier 3H call and his "partner" East then signed off (!) in 3S.

West has NOTHING extra and NO pleasant surprises - either in high cards or in shape, yet he slaps his "partner" in the face by overruling the call to sign off, and he UNILATERALLY and for NO reason bids FOUR spades.

How did THAT work out? As "well" as it deserved: 4S went down two.

I've said this before, but it bears repeating: Not only are the GIBBO robots among the worst "bridge players" of all time, but they are also among the worst PARTNERS of all time.

https://www.bridgeba...CS8%7Cmc%7C8%7C

[benellis58]

I earlier signed out of the Forum because I had absolutely no intention of making any further posts today, but I'm currently playing a robot game and I just witnessed something so mind-blowingly stupid and infuriating that I had to come back here. Why? To mention that the GIBBO robots are by FAR the worst garbage I have EVER seen ANYWHERE in ANYTHING relating to bridge. I will write about the hand that prompted this post tomorrow. We KNOW the GIBBO robots are bad, and we live with it, but there is "bad" and then there is unrelentingly HORRRENDOUS. Why, oh why, can't these utter monstrosities be JUST "bad"? Why do they have to be so EARTH-SHATTERINGLY horrendous?

[benellis58]

Interested in a good laugh? Great! Keep reading, in that case.

As I've previously mentioned, I often play free four-board robot "Challenges", but I play them "Hearts-Style". On every hand, at my first opportunity to bid, I bid 7NT, and if I get doubled, I redouble. I then try to take as FEW tricks as possible. A perfect result would therefore be down 13.

The robots, of course, are unaware of this and think that I am trying to take as MANY tricks as possible. They are playing "normal" bridge (at least THEIR idea of normal bridge!) and are therefore playing their - ahem - "best" and trying to win as many tricks as possible.

Whatever happens in these games has absolutely NO effect on ANY other games played by ANY humans ANYWHERE. I'm just saying that in case some Nervous Nelly thinks that my playing "Hearts-Style" will skew someone's results somewhere. NO. It won't.

Anyway, look at the hand linked at the bottom of this post. The East-West robots are "defending" SEVEN NO TRUMP REDOUBLED. Watch how "good" their "defence" is:

West has 8, KQ9862, 5, J8532. You know, I kind of suspect that against SEVEN NO TRUMP REDOUBLED, most bridge players (!) would lead the heart king! But the GIBBO robot on lead led his...stiff 5 of diamonds!

Dummy North tabled KJ1075, 7, A10863, 104. I called for the 8 and East won his king, as I, South, played the queen. Remember: I am trying to LOSE as many tricks as possible, but the robots don't know that, and they are trying to WIN as many as possible.

East, who just won trick one with his diamond king, now has these 12 cards remaining: 6, 43, J972, AK976. He now shifts to a club...the SEVEN (UNDERLEADING his AK...against SEVEN NO TRUMP REDOUBLED!).

I, perforce, win my stiff queen (AGAINST my wishes, since I'm trying to LOSE tricks). Then at trick three I play my heart jack towards dummy's stiff 7. West wins his queen, and then at trick four he plays his ...DEUCE (!) of HEARTS (the suit that I, DECLARER, just led - and remember that HE thinks I am trying to WIN tricks!). I am FORCED to WIN this trick also, as East was born with 43 dub.

And THAT, my friends, is how "well" these GIBBO goobers "defend"...EVEN against a redoubled grand slam!

The ONLY thing I will say in their defence is that I think in the free Challenge games the GIBBO robots might not be the "advanced" ones, but that's probably irrelevant, because the "advanced" ones are all hopeless anyway.

https://www.bridgeba...C9%7Cpc%7CS2%7C

[benellis58]

TRULY stupid lead by North. Why do these GIBBO halfwits LOVE leading their worthless doubletons? And here it's even more ridiculous than usual because the jerk has an OBVIOUS diamond lead holding the KQ. They NEVER cease to amaze me with their unending stupidity.

https://www.bridgeba...CJ%7Cpc%7CCA%7C

[benellis58]

Pathetic "defence":

https://www.bridgeba...H6%7Cmc%7C10%7C

[benellis58]

Sadly, North's MONUMENTALLY stupid 3S bid is not a momentary, one-time lapse of reason. It is a COMMON sickness for these GIBBO trashcans. For some twisted reason, they LOVE to pull out these IMBECILIC cuebids at high levels. Why does the abject M.O.R.O.N. think it's necessary to bid three SPADES? Why can't the clueless reject bid 3D like any NORMAL player? ANY time my GIBBO "partner" cuebids, I fully EXPECT it to be a completely I.D.I.O.T.I.C. call, and my dire prediction almost always turns out to be accurate. GIBBO robots are the pits.

https://www.bridgeba...C4%7Cpc%7CSQ%7C

[benellis58]

Another pathetic "defence":

https://www.bridgeba...DQ%7Cmc%7C11%7C

[benellis58]

For ONCE the robots defend decently, but there's ALWAYS something bad with GIB/GIBBO. This time it's a typically pathetic GIB definition.

GIB defines West's double of 4H as "5+ spades; 17 HCP; 18-19 total points". Why the HELL should his double require 17 HCP? WHY? And comically, according to the ALWAYS pathetic GIB definition, it must be EXACTLY 17. 16? Oh no, that would NEVER do. 18? Impossible. It MUST be EXACTLY 17 HCP for West to double.

What a REMARKABLE load of complete hogwash! And I guess West didn't take his own GIB definition seriously, since he did NOT have exactly "17 HCP". He had exactly...TEN HCP! Not even in the same POSTAL CODE!

Just stop to consider that SOMEONE actually WROTE this absurd definition.

https://www.bridgeba...CDT%7Cmc%7C9%7C

[benellis58]

Three consecutive M.O.R.O.N.I.C. bids by North, plus the usual rash of pathetic GIB definitions:

North describes his hand with his 1NT call. Fine. Now he should just shut up for the rest of the auction, but he's INCAPABLE of shutting up, because he LOVES spewing garbage and creating ridiculous auctions. It's what he DOES. It's what gives him PLEASURE.

East passes and South, with his 4-2-1-6 hand, bids a perfectly normal 2C. This is STUPIDLY defined by GIB as:

"Good suit". Well, I don't think it necessarily has to be a GOOD suit, but it DOES have to be a LONG suit (at least 6 cards).

"11-21 HCP". Oh, REALLY, GIB? You're telling us he could have TWENTY-ONE HCP and he would ONLY bid TWO clubs? You know what, GIB? I think this - all by itself - shows that you know NOTHING about bidding.

West now makes a takeout double and for no reason whatsoever, North bids a M.O.R.O.N.I.C. 2D. Why the Hell is he bidding his MERE four-bagger after his earlier 1NT call already FULLY described his hand? Is this one of his famous (and ALWAYS stupid!) "rescue" bids? Who knows WHAT it is, apart from the fact that WHATEVER it is, it's imbecilic.

East passes and South, with his STIFF diamond, KNOWS two things: One is that 2D is NOT the place to play this hand, and the other is that his "partner" is one of the worst "bridge players" of all time. South bids 2S. He KNOWS that his centre hand opponent (by FAR the MOST dangerous of his THREE opponents on the hand) doesn't have four spades, but at least the auction will stay at the TWO level in spades.

West passes and - oh yeah, no surprise - here we go AGAIN with one of North's beloved and INSANE cuebids (!) at a HIGH level, as the ignorant clod decides that he MUST now bid three HEARTS! If we measure the IQ of a GIBBO robot, it will probably be BELOW zero. The imbecile who earlier FULLY described his hand with his 1NT call, and whose partner South has NEVER shown any extras, NOW makes a 3H bid defined as "forcing to 3NT". That in itself is insane, but if he is indeed stupidly forcing to 3NT, why doesn't he just BID 3NT? Ludicrous as that would be, it would at least be less ludicrous (and less infuriating) than his imbecilic 3H cuebid!

South, with NOWHERE to go, bids 3S, hoping that North will either pass 3S or bid 3NT, since SOUTH doesn't have a heart stopper but NORTH does. South does NOT want to be in 3S or 3NT - he WANTED to be in two lowly clubs but then North started bidding red suits like the I.D.I.O.T. that he is and ALL his GIBBO brethren are. and NOW staying at the (sigh!) THREE level seems like the best way to avoid total disaster.

West passes and North bids...4S, as yet another JOKE of an auction goes into the GIBBO annals of ignorance. BTW, there were other travesties in the GIB definitions on this hand, but I'm too disgusted to mention all of them.

https://www.bridgeba...CD7%7Cmc%7C8%7C

[benellis58]

South bids 4NT, Blackwood for hearts. He is pleased to see that even though the GIB definition is pathetic as usual, it at least is correct on the MAIN issue: It specifically and correctly states that the 4NT call is "Blackwood for hearts". Bravo.

North responds 5C. In the antiquated, hugely inferior Blackwood response structure that GIBBO foolishly plays, 5C shows zero or three key cards, but South, a cautious sort, decides to read the definition just to make sure. Consequently, he clicks on the 5C call to see how GIB describes it...and he rolls his eyes when he reads these RIDICULOUS words: "Biddable hearts; 17+ total points". That's it, that's ALL! 4NT, remember, was correctly defined as |Blackwood for hearts"...yet the 5C response...DOES NOT ANSWER THE QUESTION and instead merely repeats the SAME explanation that was given for North's earlier 2H bid!

We ALL know that GIB definitions are almost ALWAYS pathetic. They're poorly written, often inaccurate, often neglect to include CRUCIAL information, and often include utter BILGE (such as describing 1C as a "minor-suit opening", or constantly pointing out that 3NT is "game", etc.). But THIS piece of nonsense takes the CAKE even for GIBBO! One of the first things a BEGINNER learns is how to respond to Blackwood, yet the GIB definition of 5C totally IGNORES the question that WAS ASKED!

https://www.bridgeba...C5%7Cmc%7C13%7C

[benellis58]

North's hand actually DOES match the GIB definition of his double, which is a miracle...but it's a STUPID definition and a STUPID bid. The definition is "4+ hearts; 2 spades; 6+ total points". His earlier 1H response to South's 1D opener was defined as "4+ hearts; 6+ total points", so the double tells us NOTHING that we did not already know about his hearts OR his points, and the ONLY new info it gives us is that he has EXACTLY 2 spades. Why the HELL would the double show EXACTLY 2 spades...and how is that information of ANY use anyway? And why would a potentially USEFUL call of double be WASTED with this definition that says NOTHING specific, NOTHING new (except for the nonsense about exactly two spades) and NOTHING remotely useful...since the LITTLE it does say is HOPELESSLY vague: "4+ hearts" literally means 4 to 13. "6+ total points" isn't EVEN limited to 6-37 (which would be ridiculously broad anyway) because it's talking about "total" points, which, unlike HCP, could be MORE than 37. When a definition is this TOTALLY useless, there is no point in even writing it. And why does North feel it's NECESSARY to COMMIT this useless double with 42, K1062, K7, J10875?

https://www.bridgeba...SQ%7Cpc%7CHJ%7C